Dear Jackass

It already says Range Rover on the back of your SUV.
It also says Range Rover on the license plate holder.
Therefore, I decree your personalized license plate of "RNGE RVER" to be repetitive, annoying and bleeping stupid.

Sincerely,
Phil

Blogcation officially over

Sorry 'bout the delay, I've been busy keeping my couch pinnned to the floor or else that sucker would run clean away.

Actually, there were some computer issues as well.


Anyway, I'm here to complain about my excellent health insurance. See, during the periods of my life when I didn't have health insurance or had crappy insurance, which was, uh, any time preceeding 2007, I spent about 0 hours in the doctor's office.

Simply put - I couldn't afford to be sick. I had one surgery (I still miss you, gall bladder. Call me.) but other than that I ignored all aches and pains, assuming they would just go away or I'd die. It was a healthcare philosophy that worked incredibly well seeing as I'm still alive.

But now, I have a very nice health insurance package with my cushy corporate life and I can actually afford to go see the doctor. So, I do. I've seen more doctors in the last two years than the 15 previous. And the more you go to the doctor, the more shit they find wrong with you.

The latest? TMJ. (See diagram above.)

I don't really know what TMJ is, but it can hurt like a mother. So, now I gotta get some kind of mouth guard to wear while I sleep. I had one when I was 13. Glad to see I'm regressing.

And I'm already wearing those breathe right nose strips on my nose. Now a mouthpiece. Maybe I'll just start sleeping in a goddam football uniform.